10/11/2020 0 By Matheus


This morning we woke up, just under the clouds. The sky was grey, and patches of fog were floating through the valley, whirling, and dancing. These are moments where the fireplace is so attractive, even knowing that the hike is refreshing and a great moment for reflection. Also, in times of Lockdown it is a necessary exercise to keep the body happy, so we went out, up the mountain into the mist. Once you are out there, forget about the cosy fireplace, enjoy the smell of eucalyptus and herbs that are drifting on the breeze. I see footprints of deer and wild boar in the mud of the path. Going higher we get fully surrounded by the clouds, a thick mist is reducing our outer references to zero and almost automatically I turn my attention inside. We had some troubling personal times, apart from the Covid-19 lockdown, and thoughts and reflections are coming up from a deeper layer inside. The heavy mist is perfect for this because all other stimuli are silenced. Just me and my thoughts and feelings, in this stillness, the voice of intuition is significantly clearer, and it is much easier to come to some conclusions that actually make sense.

While walking in the still mist, it carried to me the smell of a fire and chorizo, the local sausage. These chorizos are hung in a shed with a small but smoky fire that preserves the sausage. It may take some days to complete the process. I could not see the farm, but the smell brought me some fantasy memories. I could imagine travellers on the small road in the past, going on foot, with a donkey carrying their belongings or products for the annual market in the old town of Silves. How welcome would be the smell of a fire and food, indicating that we were coming close to the inn where we can spend the night. Out of the cold into the warmth, hot food, and a nice bed of hay where little field mice rustle around. Yes, my fantasy takes me places but these little thoughts of comfort are somehow important when we are going through difficult times.

One of our best friends is with a life-threatening illness at the moment, she has been going thru a heart-breaking process for almost a year now. It is hard to imagine the extent of the suffering if you have not gone thru it yourself, it is not easy to feel your throat suffocating you when everybody tells you to be positive, while all you really want to do is shout your heart out. These are moments that we, bystanders, sometimes lack words, and a big warm hug would say so much more but in the days of Covid-19 it is dangerous as they say and therefore not allowed. Walking in the mist she comes to my mind and I send her a huge hug in spirit. It is amazing how we can drift from a medieval inn to a hospital room in seconds, from the warm comfort to the cold uncertainty of chemotherapy. Embracing one’s heart and whispering soft words of empowerment and courage into the mist. Wishing for a day soon, where the sun will rise, the birds will twitter, and a gentle breeze will brush your worries away.

with love, my dear friend